Sunday, March 23, 2008

Another Bend in the Road

I have waited to blog about this until I knew it was going to happen. Rachel is going to Montana to spend the summer with the Thompsons. They are her Parelli instructors, and have been such an inspiration to her to pursue her dreams. She'll fit right in. I am so excited for her, and yet overwhelmed at the thought. I guess I am getting another good dose of reality. I used to poo-poo the idea of a 'mid life crisis', and though I prefer to call it a mid life evaluation, I understand the struggle to come to grips with the idea that half of your life is behind you. It is a good thing to stop and consider if you are headed in the direction you want to be, and ask yourself what needs to change. It doesn't, however, give people a license to sin, or quit and start over. Now I find myself with an overflowing house full of children, and yet suffering from the 'empty nest' syndrome. And she hasn't even left yet! Just when they grow up and mature enough for you to be able to embrace them as comrades as well as your children, they flap their wings and leave the nest. Knowing where she is headed, and the challenges she has facing her, I can say with confidence that she will come back a different person. This is an opportunity for her to make great strides in her training. She'll easily earn her blue string (level 2) while she's there. Christopher is determined not to let her get too far ahead of him, and knowing his tenacity, he'll be ready for his assessment in the fall.
I leave on a red eye with Hannah and Matthew for a week in Dallas on Tuesday. I am looking forward to it, and hoping it will be a good time to connect with Hannah a little better. It is deja vu for me, and I am trying to do things differently, and praying for a different outcome. I want to be a wise woman and build instead of tear down. I am just so emotionally driven that it hard for me to reprogram. It is funny how your kids can learn to push your buttons. I am working really hard at not letting that happen. Rachel, my peacemaker, has been a great help in that dept. Hopefully I won't regress when she isn't around.
Our schedule is SO booked for the next 5 or 6 weeks. There is not a single weekend that we don't have something going on. Most weekends we're juggling at least two events - sometimes three. I won't have time to get my breath before Rachel leaves. In a way I guess it will be good because I won't be dwelling too much on it.
I'll try to post if I have a spare minute. I am wondering how I am going to find time to exhale, much less spend any time on the computer.

Sunday, March 9, 2008

And the Lord directs our Path

Sometimes it looks as if we are choosing our steps, but the Lord always has his hand on us, guiding us, and directing our paths. I am thankful for the opportunity to begin to dream again, but Noble won't be the one to fulfill it. Gut instinct coupled with encouragement from many wise counselors gave me the inclination to do some further research before I drove 5 hours to see him. I called the trainer who had him for almost a year, and the breeder who first owned him. The information they shared was very revealing to say the least. Leaving out unnecessary details - suffice it to say that he SHOULD be gelded. He is a carrier of a genetic defect called SCID which is fatal when matched with another carrier. It is particularly prevalent in Arabians.
So the dream is alive again, but it will remain just that - a dream... for now anyway.

We have also made the decision to sell down our goats so the children can focus more on horses. The challenge will be to find a way to financially support our 'habit' with horses. Goats and their by-products are much more marketable and breaking even is at least attainable. I am told the only way to make a small fortune in the horse industry is to start with a large one. I am still leaning toward buying and selling - and breeding. I was even thinking that it would be really cool to market Parelli Ponies - but I am sure that we'd have to come up with another name. I think it would be a great market though - to play the seven games and get them to level 2 - then include in the purchase price an introduction to Parelli and how to have a relationship with the horse with an emphasis on safety. I was also thinking about OTT TBs - restarting them and then finding suitable partners for them would be a way to rescue some horses and support our habit too. Like with goats, I think our challenge might be letting them go! :)

New pictures might still be a long time coming. We got a new battery but apparently it is the charger that is not working. It may be a challenge to find a new one since they don't even make the model we have anymore.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

The Horse of My Dreams

Life has its twists and turns, ups and downs, hills and valleys. These past couple of years have been challenging to say the least. God is gracious though, and knows when we have shouldered all we can bear. It looks like there is a major curve coming up in the road I call life. When I was a little girl, I had grand dreams. Somewhere along the way I was convinced that dreams don't come true, and I accepted that. My dreams were tucked neatly away and I proceeded to grow up. Adults don't have time to dream. The day to day tasks simply take too much energy. Somehow or another though, when Rachel and Christopher started their Parelli journey, that dream began to stir in me. A dream to have a horse farm, to raise Arabians, to make horses an integral part of my life again....
Another dream began to take shape about a year ago. We started thinking of moving to Montana. We put the house on the market. Nothing happened. The dream began to wilt and with it my hopes of fulfilling my childhood dream. The horse farm and the move to Montana are intertwined. I don't see one happening without the other, although God has a way of directing our paths - even when we are choosing our steps. When it comes to choices in life, timing is everything. Being at the right place at the right time - or even the wrong place at the right time can change your life forever. A series of events has begun that will begin a turning point in our lives. It looks very promising that hubby will get a job with a very good company in Idaho or Montana. At the same time, I have the opportunity to aquire the foundation for a breeding farm. I don't believe in coincidence. I saw a post on a forum about a black Arabian stallion the same day that Clay talked to the headhunter about a company in Idaho/Montana.
My hope is renewed; my dream is alive. Noble Knight is his name. Isn't he the most gorgeous horse you ever saw? I won't know for sure until I meet him face to face, but my heart tells me he is the horse of my dreams. We're planning a trip down in a couple of weeks. I may burst with excitement before then!

A Dream of a Lifetime - Noble Knight